Boom Boom!

 


USAngel wears pumps and pantyhose with her dress and is therefore immune to shoelace gags by juvenile delinquents.

Spike Thrasher sneaks up behind Purps and whispers in her ear. "Boom."

Miss Purple jumps upright and spins on her heels to face Spike. She grins and pushes Spike playfully, "Don’t sneak up Me!" She winks. "Booms aren’t sneaky!" She sniggers.

Spike Thrasher snickers and says, "Oh yes they are!" And at that moment a small line of parker cars indeed go "BOOM!" one after another, a tire flying through the window of Taz' Treats and bouncing up to Angel's stool as, one by one... BOOM by BOOM... the line of vehicles shoots into the air and then lands askew.

USAngel exclaims, “Whoa! Is somebody filming an action movie scene!” Angel dives over the countertop for cover.

Spike Thrasher smirks and winks at Purps and nods enthusiastically to Angel. "Yup! That must be it!"

Miss Purple laughs clapping her hands together. She admires the explosion one after the next "You sure do know how to make an entrance?!" she winks and nudges Spike in the stomach with her elbow. "Is this how you impress all the ladies?!" She walks up to the smoldering wrecks to inspect them further.

Amelia flashes downwards, vanishing from a bolt of lightning up on the roof of a nearby building and reforming there in the shop. She scowls out at the street, covering her ears to blot out the annoyingly loud explosions.

TeleThinker walks over to USAngel. "What's an angel like you doing in a demolished dump like this?"

USAngel glances over the countertop. “Well I was looking to get a root beer float after an afternoon of shopping.”

Spike Thrasher grins and ducks as another tire careens down the street, bouncing and rolling into the intersection to the screech of tires, crunching of metal and crashing of glass. "I swear! People in Empire City really need to learn how to drive!"

Yeti Taz serves the root beer float and calls his insurance broker...again.

USAngel grins and sips her float. “Is that guy making the movie related to Spike Lee, Taz?”

Miss Purple skips around the wreckages of the cars, grinning and clapping her hands jumping small 360 spins "Boooom boooom boooom! All the cars go KABOOM!"

TeleThinker observes, “A root beer float? As it were, I know a nice quiet place, away from this mess. Let me take you away from all this... mayhem.”

Amelia elbows USAngel. "You know, this is one of your rare chances to pretend to be a real superheroine."

USAngel turns away from TeleThinker as Amelia nudges her. “But I'm not even in costume, Amelia! And I don't have my staff! But I suppose if there's any chance I could stop this delinquent I should try...”

Spike Thrasher frowns. "Except for that one." He slowly stalks down towards a blue Prius, glaring at the lone vehicle in the line that did not go BOOM.

Miss Purple spins on the spot and begins to follow Spike, running swiftly up behind him weaving in and out. "Where is the boom boom?!" she shouts as she runs up and leaps up on to the roof of the car, bouncing it up and down, before sliding down the front on her backside.

USAngel bites her lip and makes a worried face. “Ohmygawd... it's turning into a riot!”

Spike Thrasher inspects the vehicle, frowning. "Where's the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom!"

USAngel looks around the shop, finally snatching up a coat rack, twirling it as she marches outside.

Miss Purple scrambles up to the roof of the car once more, standing up right "Ohhhh Spike Oh Spike! Do you need a helping hand?!" She sniggers and sinks her hand to her belt, pulling out a small unmarked tube and shaking it in front of him. "May I?!" she even blushes a little as the wind sweeps her fire red hair across her face.

Spike Thrasher grins. "That's right. This one is set on a motion sensor." He opens the car door, slips the vehicle into neutral and then hurries to Purps. "Yes. You may help by helping me push. The car has to be moving to blow up!"

“Stop right there, skate punks!” USAngel points coat rack at Spike and Purple. “I said stop! Don't you know who I am!?” Angel looks down at her form-fitting sheath dress. “Ok, well, so I'm not in costume, but I do play USAngel on television...”

Miss Purple blinks and looks down to USAngel from the top of the car "Ummmm a.. thief? Did you just steal that coat rack missus... I’m a policewoman you know!" sniggering as she leaps down behind the car, and leans up against the rear "You may wanna... step aside!"

USAngel shakes her head. "I commandeered it in the line of superheroine duty... now come quietly or I may be forced to use it!"

Spike Thrasher laughs and says, "PUSH" as he leans in and starts to get the vehicle rolling. "Stop yapping, Purps honey, and help me move this car!"

Miss Purple looks herself up and down. "But... I’m not wearing a coat?!" She says in a genuinely confused tone, before looking to Spike. "Do you have a coat?!" She sniggers as she listens to Spike and begins to charge into the car, leaning into it and pushing it hard, walking behind it slowly.

“Okay! That does it!” USAngel lunges forward and sweeps at the ankles of Spike and Purps with the hooks on the end of the coat rack.

Spike Thrasher loses his balance just as he gets a bit of momentum going into the vehicle.

Miss Purple falls forward just as the car falls away from her, rolling on its own. She lands flat on the floor, putting her hands out to stop herself "Owwie... that’s not how you use a coat rack...." She grins before scrambling to her feet.

USAngel moves to stand over Spike and point the coat rack at his face. "Now stay put while I stop that car!"

Spike Thrasher snickers and nods. "Oh, yes, ma'am," He says as he slips a black cat firecracker from his pocket.

USAngel spins to run after the car and trips in her heels, but manages to stop her fall with the makeshift staff, using it to pole vault to the roof of the car as she comes out of her pumps.

Miss Purple smiles as she skips up over, and watches USAngel as she head off down the road, holding her hand out to help Spike up "So... when is the boom?!" she asks, sniggering a bit.

USAngel crouches atop the moving car, her flexing thighs shimmering in sheer nylon.

Spike Thrasher laughs. "When the car comes to a stop, of course. Ain't you ever seen Speed?"

USAngel bites her lip as she tries to figure out how to stop the moving vehicle.

Miss Purple grins a little, "Well lets see if she can manage it.... I hope for her sake she bails off though... she needs to loosen up not blow up!"

“But, don't worry. She's a superheroine. I'm sure she'll survive it.” Spike Thrasher grins and puts an arm around Purps' waist while watching Angel try and stop the car.

USAngel sighs and slides to the trunk, unaware the hem of her dress is sliding up to the curve of her rump, hooking one end of the coat rack over the bumper before dropping the other end like an anchor, sparks flying as it drags the pavement. She then looks around to see where the car is headed, her eyes growing large as saucers. “Ohmygawd! It's going to hit that tanker truck!”

Miss Purple leans into Spike slightly, blushing just a tiny bit, though it’s hidden by her messy hair. "Biggboooom whereeee are youuuuu!" she says very quietly.

Spike Thrasher exclaims, “Awesome! It IS going to hit that tanker truck. It's going to go... KABOOOOOOM!”

USAngel scrambles to the roof and, gripping the window frame, somersaults inside, going bottoms up briefly before plopping down behind the wheel, slamming her stocking foot down on the brake, completely oblivious to the fact that the car will explode when it stops moving. She gasps as the brake goes to the floor but the car continues to rush toward the tanker truck. “Damn piece of junk! The brakes in this Prius don't work...”

Miss Purple looks up to Spike. "You got a thing against Prius' don’t ya..." she sniggers?

USAngel swerves to avoid the tanker truck only to end up headed straight toward a BaleTec outlet, fortunately closed on Sunday.

Spike Thrasher pulls Purps closer as he watches. "Not really. Except that someone is trying to pretend that a lunchbox is a car."

USAngel bails out through the window right before the car plows into the storefront. She ducks a shoulder and rolls like a former gymnast, coming easily to her feet just in time to be sent flying by the resulting explosion as the car comes to a stop in the iCee department of the store. “Nnnghhhh...”

Miss Purple winces as the car goes through the shop window. "Oh... ouch... I’m going to hear about that one..." she says, shaking her head but still grinning from ear to ear at the beautiful bang.

Spike Thrasher watches in fascinated glee as the car plows into the store, coming to a complete stop before ... KABOOM! The storefront rises and then sends timbers of plaster, glass, electrical parts and other nonsense in all sorts of directions. The Prius goes flying as well, as a wheel and an iCee phone or two are sent flying in Angel's direction.

USAngel flies across the street and smacks against the brick facade of the facing building, crumpling to the sidewalk, shaking her head and starting to rise just as a flying tire comes down over her head and shoulders, lodging tightly about her, pinning elbows to waist.

Spike Thrasher turns and looks at Purple. "That woman should be arrested for reckless driving. Wait. Where is your police woman's hat?"

Miss Purple shrugs her shoulders "Have you seen my hat collection!" She laughs a bit "It may be at home! I might have to pick up another..." she says pondering this deeply. "Well that was fun...! Boom boom ka BOOM!"

USAngel blinks and looks down, her face reddening, hands flailing as she tries to fix the dress that has ridden up nylon-clad hips, the hem now also pinned about her waist.

Orb rockets up to USAngel, takes a picture, zaps then rockets away again.

USAngel yelps and hops about when zapped, frantic to free herself of the tire and fix her dress.

Spike Thrasher kisses Purps on the cheek and then takes his firecracker and starts to walk towards Angel. "Poor girl is stuck. She needs our help!"

Miss Purple blushes and giggles quite madly, before running after Spike, trying to keep up. "Help help help, who are the true heroes in this town!" she laughs jumping around Spike like a mad rabbit, spinning and twirling before they reach up to USAngel "Hi Ma’am! Don’t worry I’m a policewoman, we are hear to help... return that coat rack back to Taz' Treats!"

USAngel shakes her head at the two hoodlums!

Spike Thrasher steps up to Angel and then points at the dress. "We might have to add indecent exposure to the charges, Officer Purps."

Miss Purple tuts and shakes her head at USAngel. "So what do we have?! Stole a coat rack... stole a car... driving quite possibly under the influence... blowing up a shop... and now this?!" She sniggers madly, as she skips around USAngel.

USAngel tries to cross her legs to cover the nylon-clad pucker between them, but this only accentuates the plumpness of her shiny hiney.

Deusius raises an eyebrow, watching the show. "Nice moon."

Spike Thrasher chuckles. "Unacceptable! This type of behavior is a bad example for the impressionable youth of Empire City. I say we fine US Angel and sentence her to a tiny boom." He holds up the Black Cat firecracker.

Miss Purple nods "My eyes! My poooooooor eyes! I will never be able to..." she trials off taking a good look up and down the woman "Never... be able to forget this!" she laughs completing her sentence.

USAngel strains furiously against the rubber tire, arms, shoulders and boobies alike popping out in sharp definition under the wine-colored fabric of her dress. “Why don't you just help me you... you... you hooligans!”

Miss Purple looks shocked. "You hit me with a coat rack!" She argues back shaking her head and tutting. "Looking at the evidence here.... I think you may be the hoodlum!" She nods and carries on skipping around, far too energetic to stop moving right now.

Spike Thrasher lights the firecracker and drops it into Angel's cleavage down the front of her dress as she squirms. "Here. This should help free ya!"

USAngel blinks as the Thrasher drops a lighted explosive down between her boobs as they roll about like buoys on an angry sea beneath the wine-colored stretch fabric. She gulps and vows to self never to listen to Amelia again if she gets out of this mess alive.

Miss Purple smiles so sweetly as she watches the scene from the front lines. "Don’t worry Ma’am, we know you are a criminal, but we are here to help every member of society!"

Spike Thrasher nods emphatically. "That's right! Hate the crime, not the criminal."

USAngel feels the fuse burning at her bellybutton, trying not to giggle as her tickle reflex kicks in. She dances about wildly for an instant before falling over, the tire beginning to roll away down the street with her stout little form still trapped, turning over and over, until there is a vicious blowout and her body goes flopping boobs over butt into the intersection beyond, her dress destroyed, runs in her pantyhose, smoke rising from her prone form.

Trish walks up, drawn to the commotion. “Sheesh, what happened to her?”

Spike Thrasher looks to Purps, lips nearly touching hers as he whispers, "boom."

Miss Purple sniggers and claps her hands together. "Oh too good! Let that be a warning to all you criminals!" She puts her hands on her hips and nods firmly, looking up to Spike and realizing he is face to face with her. She blushes slightly and replies "Kaboom!"

USAngel still lies in the street, groaning and trying to move as the light changes.

Spike Thrasher slips off with Purps as a trucker slams on his brakes to just avoid running over Angel's body. The wail of sirens in the distance gets closer. "Good. The authorities are coming to pick her up. Look at the mess she made!"

The trucker leans out of his window and curses. "Why can't the damn city clean up all this roadkill... I nearly got splatter on my rig!"

Miss Purple nods firmly as she skips off with Spike. "Yes back up is arriving! But I do hope she just ends up with some community service... I suppose I’m a bit of a softy!" She sniggers and skips on ahead.

USAngel's eyes roll back as the police and EMS arrive on the scene. "Clear!" yells the EMS guy before he applies the pads and Angel's body lurches.

Spike Thrasher watches behind as an ambulance arrives and Angel is loaded slowly onto a gurney.

USAngel amazingly recovers quickly as the ambulance speeds away and is already well enough to be signing autographs by the time they arrive at Empire Mercy Hospital.

(Oct 2009)